Lamb on the Run: Tubac man proposes county with no seat

I guess you’ve heard of the plans by David Verwys and Randy Graf to split off a part of Pima County south of Pima Mine Road and annex it into Santa Cruz County…

…They complain that this area sends a lot more in taxes to Pima County than it ever gets in county services…

…Well Tubac’s Hugh Holub has another idea: take unincorporated Green Valley and unincorporated Tubac and form their own county, Kokopelli…

…“I suggest leaving the Town of Sahuarita out of Kokopelli County so that there is no incorporated city or town in the new county…That would make it difficult to have an official ‘county seat’ in a fixed location…

…“The Kokopelli County seat could be an RV that would move from one shopping area parking lot to another on a regular basis…

…“This would be in keeping with the itinerant tradition of the ancient Indian Flute Player…

…“Just imagine all the new political opportunities Kokopelli County would create…

…There would need to be three county supervisors as well as a county recorder, assessor, treasurer, school superintendent, sheriff and judges…

…“That's a lot of new high-paying jobs for the area”…

…Hmmm…Maybe the process server could get a side job delivering groceries from the supermarket that’s next to this week’s Court House Trailer…

Looking for license plates … “KSERA 2” (I thought it was que sera—“whatever will be, will be”) … “PSTEEL on a pickup whose rear window sticker read “Pittsburgh Steelers” … “I KING” …

… “T 4 2” …

Remember last summer when a young Arizona girl was killed when she fell into an abandoned mine?…

…To reduce similar hazards, state Mine Inspector Joe Hart has an idea to fill up something like 9,500 abandoned mines in the state…

…Use old tires, maybe donations of older inert substances such as broken glass and chunks of concrete from old construction projects…

…Said Hart, “I just want to fill it up. You can’t fall into a filled-up hole”…

…So far the Legislature hasn’t come across with the $1.2 million Inspector Hart said it would take…

…But here’s another idea…Since so many places are running out of places to throw away trash, convert the old mines to mini town dumps…

…It would take an awfully lot of old egg shells to fill up just one mine shaft…

Dan Brocious, who works at the Mount Hopkins astronomy complex, said the Phoenix Lander headed toward Mars has a landing destination of “Green Valley”…

…Also Dan noticed and passed along that there are signs near the I-19 rest stop to the south on Elephant Head Road that read “UDA Loading Zone”…

…”UDA” is cop speak for undocumented aliens…Hmm?

Jim Lamb’s a reporter for the Green Valley News and often witnesses UDAs in his neighborhood. Pet dog Annie should be arrested for assault. She tries to lick them to death.